Dear Mr. and/or Mrs. Sender...

I followed some links on my friend Lea's journal, to a feminism website that entertained me for a portion of the afternoon. The Hathor Legacy is a website that examines TV, movies, etc from a feminist point of view.

I honestly don't know what I think about feminism. I've been in enough English classes to resent someone saying that every piece of literature has to do with feminism. I've also been attacked by feminists for my apparent lack of sensitivity. The terms "feminist" and "feminism" are loaded for me. I mean, technically it means that you believe in equal rights for both sexes. But it has grown to mean so much more. If someone is a Feminist do they automatically think that everything is about repressing women? The word has come a ways from it's roots. I suppose like a lot of isms have, communism for one. Not all feminists are man-eating bitches. Not all communists are Soviet spies.

My problem is that I can't figure out where I stand. Do I believe in equality? Absolutely. Not just for women, but for all people. But do I believe that our society has a serious problem with repressing women? Not as much. I believe that women have come a very long way in the last century. And sure, there's probably room still to grow. But I don't really see it as being one of our biggest flaws. Racism and homophobia are much bigger problems today than chauvinism or patriarchy.

Another problem I have is that I do think men and women are different. Inherently. At the base of it we are all mammals, after all. And in every spicies on the planet, males and females differ. Biologically, we are made differently. Females are made to be nurturers. And to stay close to home. Why? Not because females are weaker. But because they're more important. They make babies. If they die, there are no babies. If males die, well, one male's sperm can impregnate a whole species of females if it has to. Biologically, females are supposed to be protected.

Now, before anyone gets angry with me, I know that that isn't the case in a modern society. I know that I'll never be a stay at home mom. I know that some women aren't nurturing, and there's nothing wrong with that. Things have changed since we were animals. But that doesn't change how we're wired. Men and women are built different for different tasks. They think differently. They move differently. Neither better than the other, but for different purposes.

I have come up against a few examples of repression in my life (though hardly any). Someone told me once that photography was a man's profession because you had to carry all the heavy equipment. And I did resent that. Which is why I'm so torn.

The basic truth, though, is that I want to have babies, and would probably give up my dreams to do so. I like cooking and baking and taking care of people. (I don't like cleaning though... THAT trait has to be learned, there's obviously no biological use for it). And I like men who are Men. I like feeling protected. I do want a guy to open the lid of the jar, or to scare away the bird. I'm a girl, so what? Does that make me a traitor to the movement of women's rights? Besides all of these things I am also intelligent and motivated and obviously going somewhere in my life. So where do I fit in the feminist spectrum?

Maybe I don't understand enough about true feminism, maybe I only see the stereotype. That's what the website showed me. It's really insightful. I suggest you check it out.

I still don't want to hear about how everything in the world is about feminism, though. Sometimes, it's really not.